Grace: Time for Tea?

This is probably going to be one of the most bizarre articles you’ve ever read, but I’m going to tell you about a little ‘beauty experiment’ I’ve experienced in the past month in my quest to conquer the almighty, feared ‘sun burn’.

I recently went on holiday with my school friends, yes we decided to go ‘living it up’ and partying hard in Menorca; not your stereotypical eighteen year old holiday destination I’m sure. Whilst our other classmates were in Zante or Kos enjoying foam parties creating many brilliant moments that could easily appear on ‘Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents’ my group of friends had no desire to give our parents something else to hold against us...

So off to Menorca we flew, we had an AMAZING week filled with cocktails, dancing, relaxing...sunbathing, and well that’s really where my problem begins. I bought this BEAUTIFUL high waisted bikini shortly before we left and two days before the end of the holiday I decide I want a nice tan to leave with, I even undid the straps on my top as to avoid tan lines...Unfortunately it did not occur to me that half my waist (just below my belly button) was absolutely covered! Anyway long story short after about 2 hours of sunbathing or so I looked like one of those drumstick lollies, white, pink and white! My boobs were hideously white, my tummy (up to my belly button) as pink as Barbie’s convertible and yes the bottom half of my tummy back to that ghostly white skin tone of mine! It was NOT a pleasant sight!

Not only did I look RIDICULOUS, but my skin was on fire, I think I melted a good few ice cubes on my tummy alone in the early evening! One thing was for sure I wasn’t going to put up with this pain for the rest of the holiday, so off to facebook my sister I go, and what does she suggest for simple remedies to soothe sunburn. Why isn’t it obvious, have a bath in green tea of course!

I’m not proud of what happened next...but rest assured I was desperate, so I started running the bath with lukewarm water and dumped in a few tea bags. After 10 minutes or so of running the kettle back and forth from the kitchen to the ensuite bathroom, the tea bags had still not dissolved (in hindsight as my friend suggested, I should have dissolved the tea bags in a saucepan on the stove first, then poured them in the bath) this however was the sensible, obvious thing to do, so it did not occur to me! ! I can still rectify this situation I thought to myself, so once I had stirred this bath tub full of undissolved tea and slightly greenish water with a wooden spoon...it didn’t look much better. But never one to leave a job half finished, I stripped and climbed into the tub, 30 minutes should do it I thought to myself...

Long, long story short, I don’t think it made much difference, I stank of tea afterwards and accidently ended up flooding the bathroom as I forgot to tuck in the shower curtain after I washed off the tea from my burnt body.

In conclusion I would not recommend ANYONE jumping into a bath of green tea, unless you have a fetish for...organic tea, though I highly doubt this would be a desirable experience for anyone! Or if perhaps my disastrous experiences have not deterred you from wishing to experience this ‘beauty miracle’ for yourself, I would suggest a few recommendations you might want to consider...

· Actually buy peppermint tea, NOT green tea

· Don’t empty the tea bags leaving a residue of small grains sunk at the bottom of the tub

· Do not use a wooden spoon to mix this...concoction

· Make sure the shower curtain is tucked firmly into the tub to prevent flooding

Or perhaps the most simplest improvement of making sure you apply PLENTY of sun cream, thus not giving yourself the opportunity to get as burnt as I was , so you don’t resemble a drumstick lolly! Rest assured, I am STILL suffering, mentally at least! And worst of all, I now have the most silly, bizarre tan EVER! I hear block colours are in this Summer, so maybe there is a silver lining to this catastrophe as I will be the first to show off my white, pink, white combo! I should be in Vogue by Christmas!